Writer's Block
by StarlightPhoenix
Summary: Shigure has to write a oneshot for Kyo, but just lately he's been uninspired. What will he do? And will he get it finished in time?


**Writer's Block**

"Shigure!" cried a voice from the stairs. "Help!"

The novelist raised his head. "Good morning, Kyo. And how are you on this fine day?"

"Fine? Are you kidding? This is far from fine! I have a one-shot story thing which needs to be in first thing tomorrow morning!" Kyo panted.

"Why are you worrying about this now? You've got tonight to do it," Shigure mused.

"Oh, yeah. Just one problem with that: I won't have the time tonight! I promised Tohru I'd walk her to and from work!" the cat wheezed.

"Do it in the time in between."

"I can't!" he gasped. "I also promised Tohru that I'd go and do the shopping and stuff."

"Well, I'm sure if you explain to Tohru that you have urgent homework, then I think she'll understand," Shigure pondered.

"But I promised her I'd do it! I can't break a promise! Not one I made to her! I mean, she's always doing things for us," Kyo explained.

Shigure sighed. "I can understand that."

Kyo popped his head into Shigure's office. "Which is where you come in," he added before stepping in fully.

"Where… I… come in?" Shigure repeated. "I don't think I like the sound of this. But carry on."

Kyo sat down. "Could you possibly write it for me?"

Shigure laughed nervously. "You want me to do it?"

"Yeah. You've got all day and it can be about anything. Simple enough, right?"

"Well yes, but won't they know you didn't write it?"

"You could type it up on the computer so they don't have any handwriting to go by," Kyo suggested. "As for the quality, don't make it too good, but don't make it too crap either."

"I'm not sure about this, Kyo."

"What? Why? You're a writer."

"Yes, but… You see, the problem is…"

"Shigure, please! I'm begging you!"

The dog relented. "Okay, but don't expect anything great. The problem is…"

"Oh, thank you, Shigure! You're a lifesaver! Well, I'm going to school now. Bye!" Kyo bid him and rushed out the front door.

"The problem is," Shigure continued to no one, "that I have a writer's block."

- - -

Shigure sat at his desk. His pen was clutched tightly in one hand and the paper he was writing a draft on was set out in front of him. Now all he needed was his brain to get into gear and he'd be fine.

He drew in a deep breath, exhaled slowly and put pen to paper.

_I could feel the warmth of Jiro's body against mine, his hot breath prickling along my neck. A moan escaped my lips as I felt him thrust harder._

Shigure ran his fingers through his hair and screwed up the piece of paper he had just written on.

"What are you playing at?" he hissed at himself. "That's much too… adult for Kyo, let alone a piece of schoolwork!"

- - -

Shigure sat back down and took a gulp of water.

"That's it. Cool, cool water to refuel the mind," he cooed.

He took another drink and began to write once more.

_I turned my back and walked out, never to return to my hometown again. I'd lost Jiro, my only love. He was gone, and he wasn't going to return for me. I had nothing to live for and no reason to stay._

Shigure growled and scrunched that one up too. "Kyo would never write angst, suicide stuff! So much for the water!"

- - -

Shigure's fingertips patted gently against the wooden desk as he drummed them on it in time with the beat of the music he was listening to.

"Maybe I can get inspiration from this…" he thought.

"_Where's the money?" growled Jiro. "I'm an impatient man. Don't keep me waiting."_

"_I-I haven't g-got it, Mister Jiro, sir. I'm sorry. I had to buy new school clothes for my daughter," he whimpered._

_Jiro stood straight. "You haven't got the mausoleum? You had to spend it on a school uniform? That's just pathetic. You could have saved your money and got your daughter to work at the bullet with you."_

"_I'm sorry…"_

"_Sorry isn't good enough!" Jiro roared. "Is this more than you bargained for? Sugar, we're going down, swinging."_

"Inspiration! Ha! It's just a pain in the backside!" Shigure moaned, pulled out his earphones with unnecessary force and pushing the piece of paper into the bin.

- - -

"Think!" Shigure ordered himself. "Kyo is counting on you!"

He paced around his room a little more before taking his seat. He just sat there, unable to write any more.

- - -

"Dudes! I'm home!" Kyo called, releasing his grip on Tohru's hand. "Shigure! You better have done that one shot!"

Yuki met the two at the door as they took off their shoes. "I think you may have bad news, Kyo… Miss Honda, do you want some dessert?"

"That would be lovely!" she beamed, following him through.

Kyo walked in Shigure's office, not even bothering to knock. Yuki's words had stirred him somewhat.

He entered to an office which looked like a bomb had hit. Paper was strewn about everywhere, along with crisp packets, chocolate bar wrappers and the occasional soft drinks can.

Kyo walked over to the only piece of paper on Shigure's desk.

_Bloody corpses swung freely, hung by rope on the length of wood. They all wore scornful faces, much like vampires. That's what they were – deceased vampires._

_Jiro whimpered. He didn't particularly want to stay in this town, not now, but he had to. He had nowhere else to go._

_He spun round at the sound of a crunch – a loud, sharp, brittle crunch. Many more of its kind followed on from the first, and Jiro found himself panicking. Was he really in a town haunted and ruled by demons and ghouls? He prayed he'd never find out._

The door opened behind Kyo and Shigure stepped.

"Ah," was all he could manage as he noticed the expression on the neko's features. "I can explain…"

"YOU CAN EXPLAIN?" Kyo roared. "YOU HAD ALL DAY AND ALL YOU COULD MANAGE WAS THREE PARAGRAPHS? CRAP! I BET YOU WERE LOOKING AT THAT SMUTTY FILTH AGAIN, WEREN'T YOU? WELL, I HOPE YOU HAD FUN BEING A PERVERTED OLD MAN! I'M GONNA FAIL NOW THANKS TO YOU!"

"Kyo…" Shigure began.

"I don't want to hear it!" he shot. "Next time you have a writer's block, tell me so I can get someone else!"

Shigure stood in the same spot, half-laughing at the irony, half-laughing maniacally at the sheer thought of what just happened.

"Eh, heh heh heh," he laughed. "Heh heh heh."

"Shigure, are you okay?" wondered Tohru, concern spread across her face.

He blanked her and walked on, coming to a stop next to Kyo.

"Thank you, you foolish cat. You've just inspired me. I got a brand new idea for a best seller book."

Kyo blinked, confused, and watched him walk back to his office. "You know, I preferred it when he had a block. He wasn't half as psychotic!"

But we all know he was…


End file.
